Fireworks go off outside the mobbed gates of U.A. as security guards heavily inspect each person entering the premises and check their bags. Fatal, Adrian, and Walker stand atop the roof of U.A., watching everyone.
Fatal:
I know security is airtight, but I can’t help but feel anxious.
Adrian:
Everything will be fine, and if it’s not, we’ll make it fine.
Fatal:
That’s assuring…
Adrian:
Hey, I’m trying here, better than Damien.
Walker:
There’s only one member of Ivan’s army worth worrying about, and we have more than enough heroes in attendance to put her in the ground before anything can happen. Ivan would be stupid to try something this weekend.
Fatal:
Yeah… I guess that’s true.
Adrian:
Besides, what is there left to gain from attacking U.A.? He’s gotta have more sinister plots in mind than just harassing a school repeatedly.
Walker:
Well, he did just attack three of our students. I don’t think he’s done with us yet, but this weekend doesn’t seem the right time to make another targeted attack.
Adrian:
We can be relaxed but never have our guard down.
Walker:
Precisely.
Fatal looks at all people streaming into the U.A. for the Festival.
Fatal:
(God, I hope they’re right.)
Hayze walks up to the front gates of U.A.
Hayze:
Wow, that’s a lot of people…
Ash:
Tell me about it.
Hayze turns to see Ash walking up behind him.
Hayze:
Oh, hey Ash, glad to see you’re here.
Ash:
Yeah, I’ve been looking forward to today.
Hayze:
Too bad it looks like we’re going to have to wait for a while.
Ash:
Nope, the student entrance is over here. We just need to show them our student IDs, they’ll do a quick check, and we’re good.
Hayze:
Oh, that’s convenient.
Ash and Hayze enter through the student entrance. Inside they see a ton of booths set up with games, merchandise, and food creating rows and rows of entertainment.
Hayze:
Man, they did a great job with this place.
Ash:
I know! It really feels like a festival!
Hayze notices something.
Ash:
Huh? Do you see something?
Hayze points at a booth. The sign above reads: Demetri and Isaiah’s Lovenasium.
Ash:
Don’t tell me…
Demetri and Isaiah pop out from behind the booth.
Demetri:
COME ONE! COME ALL!
Isaiah:
Buy our limited edition products! Such as a signed photo of me!
Demetri:
Or me!
Ash and Hayze walk up to their booth.
Isaiah:
Demetri! We have our first customer!
Ash:
Who would buy anything from you two?
Isaiah:
Aw… come on, Ash! We worked hard to get all of this!
Demetri:
Yeah, we’ve got pretty high-quality stuff for sale!
Hayze:
There is a framed photo of Kevin shirtless with your head clearly photoshopped on top.
Demetri:
No… why would you think that?
Hayze:
Because your skin tones are completely different.
Demetri starts to sweat.
Demetri:
… That’s a mistake.
Hayze:
Also, these T-Shirts with “Isaiah and Demetri’s Lovenasium” on the front, clearly were made with newspaper clippings and glue.
Demetri:
No… they weren’t.
Hayze:
It’s peeling.
Demetri:
… That’s a mistake.
Ash:
How did you guys even get the literal first booth spot! This is the first store everyone is going to walk by!
Demetri and Isaiah start laughing.
Demetri:
We camped out all night!
Isaiah:
It was first come, first serve for booth spots, and we were in front of the line!
Demetri:
We figured there would be some reluctance to buy our products, but we’re more than willing to bide our time in the best spot of the Festival!
Hayze:
What makes you think this is the best spot?
Isaiah:
Are you kidding? Every single person has to come through THAT entrance! So not one person that comes to the Festival won’t see our booth!
Demetri:
Which increases our chances of making a sale!
Hayze:
That’s true… but when it comes to Festivals and Amusement parks, people usually only go past the booths by the entrance twice, once while they’re entering and once while they’re leaving. When people enter, they typically tend not to buy anything out of fear of going over budget before seeing everything. When people leave, they’ve probably already bought all they wanted and used up their budget for the day. So this spot gets you a lot of exposure at the start, but nobody will go by it more than twice.
Demetri and Isaiah are sweating bullets.
Demetri:
… That was a mistake.
Isaiah:
We sat outside the gates for 19 hours…
Ash:
Well, good luck… come on, Hayze, it stinks here.
Demetri and Isaiah:
Hey!
Ash and Hayze continue walking through the Festival.
Ash:
Man, this is so awesome! Seeing all of the students with their booths! Makes me kind of wish I set one up, you know?
Hayze:
Yeah, well, now that I’ve seen Demetri and Isaiah’s booth, I’m fearful for the rest of our class.
Ash:
Oh, come on, those two are just idiots. I’m sure everyone else’s booths will be…
Ash gets distracted by something she sees.
Hayze:
Hm? Ash?
Hayze turns to see what Ash is looking at.
Zach:
Come one! Come all! To our Bone Marrow Donation Center!
Ash and Hayze are dumbfounded.
Hayze:
He… he actually went through with it.
Zach:
Behind me in this tent is a sterile room where donations will occur! Those who donate will be given a free lollipop!
Ash:
That’s… wow.
Zach spots Ash and Hayze.
Zach:
Ash! Hayze! Come donate!
Hayze:
I’d… I’d rather not.
Jace:
Then come to my booth!
The booth directly next to Zach’s is Jace’s. It’s a slinky store.
Jace:
$5 for a slinky!
Hayze:
Jesus Christ…
Ash walks up to their booths.
Ash:
You guys set your booths up next to each other?
Zach:
We couldn’t agree on which idea was better.
Jace:
Clearly mine, you lunatic! Who in their right mind would donate their bone marrow at a festival!
Zach:
So we splintered off, and we’re going to see who gets more customers.
Hayze:
But Zach, people aren’t going to pay you to take their bone marrow.
Zach:
I know that! That’s why we’re going by the number of customers! Not profit!
Ash:
But isn’t bone marrow donation really painful and has a recovery time of multiple weeks?
Zach stares at Ash.
Zach:
I think you two should leave… you’re scaring off my customers.
Jace:
WHAT CUSTOMERS! Again, WHO IS GOING TO DONATE BONE MARROW AT A FESTIVAL!
Hayze:
Wasn’t Kevin with you guys? Where did he-
Kevin:
I’m over here!
Kevin’s booth is set up next to Jace’s. It’s an Adrenaline Shot Store. Ash and Hayze are dumbfounded again.
Kevin:
I decided to get in on the action! $2 for a shot of Adrenaline!
Hayze:
Did the teachers even screen these booths?
A man walks up to Kevin’s store.
Man:
I’ll take two.
Kevin:
That’s $4, sir!
The man hands Kevin the money. Kevin then injects him with two shots of Adrenaline.
Man:
Oh yeah! I feel alive!
The man starts running off.
Hayze:
Is this not illegal? If it isn’t, it needs to be.
Kevin:
Don’t worry! It’s not actually adrenaline! It’s liquid viagra!
Ash:
Then why did he run off like that?
Kevin:
The placebo effect.
Kevin starts refilling the syringe.
Hayze:
Woah… you’re not reusing that needle… are you?
Kevin:
Am I not supposed to?
Hayze:
Yeah… that’s how you spread diseases like HIV.
Kevin:
Uh oh… well, boys looks like I’m dropping out of the race.
Kevin starts tearing down his booth.
Ash:
*whispering to Hayze* Should we go?
Hayze:
*whispering* I think that’s for the best.
Ash and Hayze walk away.
Jace:
WHY AM I PINNED BETWEEN TWO LUNATICS!
Zach:
At least my booth is for a good cause!
Kevin:
Mine was too!
Jace:
THAT’S NOT WHAT THIS IS ABOUT!
Wes is walking through the Festival by himself.
Wes:
(Man… this is weird being alone. I need to find someone to hang around with, so I look like less of a loser than I already do. I’ll take anybody at this point…)
Wes sees two legs sticking out of a trash can.
Wes:
(I regret my previous statement.)
Wes walks over to the trash can.
Wes:
You really couldn’t go more than two hours without getting thrown out like a used condom?
Alden:
*muffled* Wes? Is that you? PLEASE HELP ME! IT SMELLS LIKE SHIT IN HERE!
Wes:
How did you even end up like this?
Alden:
*muffled* Pull me out first!
Wes:
*sighs* (He’ll probably just end up back here anyway.)
Wes grabs Alden’s legs and rips him out of the trash can.
Alden:
*coughs* I couldn’t breathe in there.
Wes drops Alden to the ground.
Alden:
Ow!
Wes:
Alright, now will you tell me how you ended up like that?
Alden:
The first thing I did when I got here was eat some Tacos. After that, I decided it would be hilarious to switch the men’s and women’s bathroom signs. But then it happened.
Wes:
What?
Alden:
Diarrhea. In a panic, I ran into the “men’s room.”
Wes:
You’re retelling this like a war story, and I feel the need to remind you it’s far from it.
Alden:
I had accidentally run into the women’s room. I was subsequently beaten up and thrown in this trash can.
Wes:
So what happened to your diarrhea?
Alden:
Remember how I said it smelled like shit in there?
Wes:
Ugh… that’s disgusting.
Alden:
Yes, and I now need to go home and change. I will see you later, my friend.
Wes:
We’re not friends.
Alden:
My acquaintance?
Wes:
I think of you the same way I think of ants.
Alden:
So… you like ants?
Wes stares at Alden.
Alden:
I will be on my way.
Alden waddles away.
Wes:
He’s one sad motherfucker…
Verity:
I agree.
Verity startles Wes.
Wes:
Someone needs to put a bell on you!
Verity:
Your friend once told me that.
Wes:
Who?
Verity:
Hayze, right before we made a deal where he would give me your phone number in exchange for an alliance during the exam.
Wes:
HE DID WHAT?
Verity:
I’ve been using it to track your cell phone and location.
Wes:
WHAT!
Verity:
You should be happy if you are ever kidnapped; the police will be able to find you before you’re raped.
Unauthorized use: this story is on Amazon without permission from the author. Report any sightings.
Wes:
WHY WOULD I BE HAPPY!
Verity:
Okay, I will let you be raped.
Wes:
THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT! And I think you knew that…
Verity:
I did.
Wes:
Okay, so on to the more significant issue… WHY ARE YOU TRACKING MY LOCATION.
Verity:
I see you’re alone.
Wes:
ANSWER ME!
Verity:
I agree, we should hang out together.
Wes:
STOP IGNORING ME!
Verity:
You’re right. I am hungry. Let’s go eat.
Wes:
THIS IS NOT A CONVERSATION.
Verity grabs Wes and starts dragging him around.
Wes:
(I should have just stuck with Alden…)
Ash and Hayze sit down at a picnic table.
Hayze:
Well, this has been eventful so far…
Ash:
Yeah… so um, I’ve been meaning to ask you about something, Hayze.
Hayze:
Oh, me too.
Ash:
Er- really? About what?
Hayze:
I’d like you to be on my team for the Showcase. It’ll be just like good old times.
Ash:
Seriously? I thought you wouldn’t want my help?
Hayze:
Why not? We used to work together back when we were first starting school. Between the Entrance Exam, the exercise against Colossus, and the Sports Festival, I know I can count on you… so what do you say?
Ash:
Of course! I’m ready to kick some butt!
Hayze smiles.
Hayze:
So… what was it you wanted to talk to me about?
Ash:
Oh… right… you know back when we first met?
Hayze:
Yeah, during the H.A.E. Exams.
Ash:
You mentioned how you failed nine times because of your quirk, and obviously, you passed that day. You’ve noted how your quirk developed later than most, which is how you got through the quirk assessment. But… you would have had to have failed the H.A.E. Exam from two weeks prior. I mean, how else could I have failed nine times? But that means in 14 days, you went from having a failing quirk to a passing one.
Hayze’s eyes widen.
Ash:
I don’t think it’s “impossible,” but I also think there’s more to it than you let on, and I want to know what that is.
Hayze:
(I can’t tell her the truth, so I have to come up with a good lie on the spot… or… maybe I don’t.) Yeah… you’re right… there is more.
Ash is surprised.
Hayze:
I have a personality disorder.
Ash:
Oh… I uh… I’m- I’m-
Hayze:
It’s okay. You didn’t know; nobody knows. My quirk’s elemental capabilities were locked away inside my alternate personalities, and it takes me drawing upon them to activate the individual elements. It’s not something I’m necessarily proud of, so I’ve been lying. I’m sorry.
Ash:
No, no, no! It’s fine! I- I understand… It's okay.
Hayze:
I’d appreciate it if you kept this between us, okay?
Ash:
Of course… I understand I’m not going to push any further.
Hayze:
It’s alright. I wasn’t going to lie to you again since you asked me directly.
Awkward silence.
Ash:
So, uh… who else will be on the team?
Hayze:
Right now, it’s just you, me, Kevin, and Blair.
Ash:
So you still have two spots open? I didn’t expect that.
Hayze:
I’ve had a lot of difficulties with my choices… either way, I need to figure out who else will be on the team before Sunday.
Ash:
Well, given what we have already, it would be useful to have someone like Isaiah on the team. Too bad he’s not eligible.
Hayze:
Wait… why Isaiah?
Ash:
Well, between you, Blair and Kevin, the team has a lot of firepower, so someone who can act as a utility would help.
Hayze:
Yeah… I see what you’re saying. It’s too bad that-
Eve:
*from afar* Ash!
Ash and Hayze both turn to see Eve stomping towards their table.
Eve:
There you are! We need to go!
Ash:
Go? Go where?
Eve:
Get ready for the pageant!
Ash:
Oh, I’m not entering th-
Eve grabs Ash’s arm and starts dragging her.
Eve:
The more, the merrier! Come on!
Ash:
Wait! Hayze!
Eve:
Who gives a fuck about him!
Eve drags Ash away.
Hayze:
Huh… I guess that means I’m on my own now. Although, what Ash said made a lot of sense. More utility could be helpful. I haven’t thought about it because of who I have to choose from, but…
Hayze is suddenly in deep thought.
Hayze:
(Wait a minute… That gives me an idea!)
Hayze gets up and starts running off.
Hayze:
(Please be where I think you are!)
There’s a stage set up for the beauty pageant. Backstage, Karma, Lilith, and Blair are getting ready.
Karma:
How do I look?
Lilith:
Awesome, Karma! You’re gonna knock them dead out there!
Blair:
Please, don’t mention the crowd…
Blair is hunched over and looks sick.
Lilith:
Blair! Are you okay?
Blair:
Standing in front of those people… wearing a dress… makes me sick…
Karma:
It won’t be that bad, Blair, honest. You look amazing.
Lilith:
Yeah, Blair! They’ll love you!
Blair:
Sure… (After putting me through this, he’d better be watching, or I’ll kill him.)
Eve enters the 2-A girl’s changing area with Ash.
Eve:
Found her!
Eve places Ash in front of a mirror and rolls over a rack of dresses.
Eve:
Find a dress and put it on.
Ash:
I… I don’t want to.
Eve:
You’re going to, and you’ll like it! Besides, I already registered you.
Ash whimpers.
Eve:
Good, and with Saige competing, that gives us five entrees, more than any other class by three!
Karma:
Five? Who else hasn't entered?
Eve:
Alexis, I can’t find her anywhere, and I think she’s ignoring me to get out of this.
Lilith:
But that still doesn’t add up. There are seven girls in the class.
Eve:
Oh, I’m not competing.
Blair:
The hell you aren’t! If I have to subject myself to this, you also have to!
Karma:
Yeah! There’s no way you’re getting out of this!
Eve:
Oh, come on, girls! We’re looking for contenders with a genuine chance to win! I wouldn’t stand a chance against all of you.
All four of them look directly at Eve’s chest.
Eve:
What?
Karma:
Get her!
All four of the girls approach Eve.
Eve:
No! No! No! No! NOOOO!
Hayze walks through the halls of U.A., talking on his phone.
Hayze:
So you’re on board to join the team? Thank you so much, I’ll keep you up to speed, and I have a plan for who the final member of the team will be. I just need to see if I can get some new equipment for the match.
Hayze hangs up the phone and walks up to Tara’s workshop. He creeks open the door.
Hayze:
Tara? Are you here?
The lights are off. Hayze turns them on.
Hayze:
Tara?
Tara is sleeping on top of her work table.
Hayze:
Tara? Wake up!
Hayze nudges Tara. She instantly leaps up into action.
Tara:
GENIUSES, NEVER SLEEP! Oh, it’s you… were you trying to take advantage of me in my sleep? I’m flattered, but you’re not my type.
Hayze:
I… wh- what does that mean?
Tara:
Isn’t it obvious? If I was going to be raped, I’d want someone with a rich history of schizophrenia to do it.
Hayze stares at Tara with a disturbed expression.
Tara:
Unless… you?
Hayze:
No! Look, I’m here to see if you can work up something for me to use during the Showcase.
Tara jumps off the table.
Tara:
More of my gadgets getting used in the Showcase? COUNT ME IN! What exactly do you need?
Hayze:
Well, I need six of them… and they’re relatively small, but I need them to do a lot. I'm sorry for coming here on such short notice, but I just got the idea.
Tara gets a sinister grin.
Tara:
Just tell me what you need!
Hayze tells Tara what he has in mind.
Tara:
Oh, that’s it? I can have those done by tomorrow. Which is good because you’ll need to register them before they can get used in the Showcase.
Hayze:
Sweet, thanks, you’re the best.
Tara:
I know! Oh, by the way, can you come here for a second?
Hayze:
Uh… why?
Tara:
Just lean in towards me.
Hayze:
I’d rather-
Tara:
Do it, or I won’t make your gear.
Hayze reluctantly leans in. Tara snatches the pendant he had tucked under his shirt and rips it over Hayze’s head.
Hayze:
Hey!
Tara:
I thought I noticed you were wearing a necklace! This is a fascinating gemstone.
Hayze:
*pained grunt*
Hayze falls to his knees, holding his head.
Hayze:
(This… this is awful. It’s like my mind is tearing apart!) AHH!
Tara examines the gem.
Tara:
Where did you find this? It doesn’t seem to be cobalt or a blue emerald… it’s something different…
Hayze:
Please… just give it back…
Tara:
Are you really having a mental breakdown over me looking at your jewelry? That’s a little sad…
Tara continues examining the gem.
Hayze:
(This is bad… I’ve gotten used to having the pendant protecting me from their influence, now it’s like I have five separate trains of thought rushing through my mind! I have to get back the ring fragment or something awful might happen!)
Hayze desperately reaches out for the pendant.
Tara:
Before I give this back, let me put it through an analyzer.
Hayze attempts to snatch the pendant; however, Tara turns to walk away from the table, causing Hayze to accidentally grab her right tit.
Tara:
Huh.
Hayze:
(Are you fucking kidding me…)
Hayze’s eyes change to yellow and start to glow. Hayze promptly stands up with no more head pain.
Tara:
That was very impulsive, but we’ve been over this. Unless you’ve got schizophrenia, I’m not interested.
Hayze:
Impulsive? I like the sound of that… I think I’ll go by Impulse.
Tara:
What? You’re changing your name?
Impulse:
Oh… sorry, I was just thinking out loud. I didn’t mean to grab your titty. I just need that pendant.
Tara:
You really want it back that bad, huh?
Impulse:
It’s uh… a family heirloom. I don’t like it when it’s not on my person, sorry.
Tara:
Whatever, if it means that much, then here you go.
Tara gives Impulse the pendant.
Impulse:
Thank you.
Impulse stuffs it in his pocket.
Tara:
Say… is there a reason you turned your quirk on?
Impulse:
I thought it would be more fun to use my quirk to get around. Anyways thanks for your help, bye!
Impulse uses lightning speed to zoom away.
Tara:
Too bad for him. This was the one day I decided to wear a bra.
Impulse speeds around the Festival.
Impulse:
(God, it feels like forever that I’ve been cooped up inside Hayze’s head! I’m so glad he accidentally grabbed that crazy chick’s chest; it was the boost I needed to beat Wrath for control! He’s already had his turn, so it’s only fair that I get to enjoy a day of freedom!)
Impulse spots a booth selling sunglasses.
Impulse:
(I guess I should have some fun and pretend to be Hayze for the day!)
Impulse speeds over to the booth and buys a pair.
Impulse:
(This is going to be the best day ever!)
A massive crowd is starting to form in front of the beauty pageant’s stage. Lilith peaks out from backstage.
Lilith:
This is so scary…
Karma:
Don’t psych yourself out, Lilith. Otherwise, you’ll end up like Eve and Blair.
Eve and Blair are both hunched over with buckets in front of them. The girls forced Eve into a dress.
Eve:
Just remember what we’re fighting for…
Blair:
Acknowledgement of our beauty…
Eve:
No… bathrooms away from the boys.
Blair:
Oh…
Ash comes out wearing a dress.
Karma:
You look cute, Ash.
Ash:
Thanks. I’m really nervous, though.
Karma:
Just take deep breaths. Everything will be fine.
Lilith:
You’re so calm, Karma. How do you do it?
Karma:
I’m perfectly secure in my looks.
Blair:
Lucky…
Eve:
Blair’s just nervous because she’s trying to impress Hayze…
Blair:
Shut up…
Eve:
Hey, don’t get mad at me. I was the one who broke up Ash and Hayze’s date…
Blair:
THEY WERE DOING WHAT!
Ash:
That wasn’t a date!
Eve:
Two people of the opposite gender and similar age eating lunch at a picnic table together during a festival. How is that not a date?
Ash:
Well, when you put it like that I-
Blair suddenly no longer looks sick; she has fire in her eyes and cracks her knuckles.
Blair:
You’re going down, bitch!
Ash whimpers.
Lilith:
Say… does anyone know where Saige is?
Blair:
Floozy probably gave up.
Karma:
Calling her a floozy and saying she gave up on a beauty pageant doesn’t make sense.
Blair:
Shut it, Karma! She just got cold feet and gave up!
Saige walks through the Festival, admiring all of the booths and enjoying the beautiful day.
Saige:
(I should be getting to the pageant soon. Otherwise, I’ll be disqualified.)
Saige spots Impulse running around like a madman checking out each booth.
Saige:
(Hayze?)
Impulse spots Saige and instantly speeds in front of her.
Impulse:
What’s cookin’ good lookin’.
Saige:
You’re not, Hayze. Which one are you?
Impulse takes off the sunglasses.
Impulse:
You really saw through me with one sentence?
Saige:
Hayze would never compliment my beauty without coercion and threats.
Impulse:
Yeah… I guess I didn’t think about that. Now that the cat’s out of the bag, wants to go out on a date?
Saige laughs.
Saige:
What emotion are you?
Impulse:
I’m, I guess… Happiness, excitement, and impulsivity.
Saige:
I had a feeling.
Impulse:
So… what do you say?
Saige:
Sorry, not interested.
Impulse:
Ah, come on, we hang out all the time!
Saige:
I hang out with Hayze, not you… uh…
Impulse:
Impulse, that’s what I’m going by.
Saige:
Okay, Impulse, while you seem like a fun guy, I don’t think you’re suitable for me.
Impulse:
Damn… playing hard to get? One second.
Impulse speeds away. One second later, he returns with roses and chocolate.
Impulse:
Please, my maiden, fall for me.
Saige:
You really have zero impulse control, huh?
Impulse:
Yup, the first thing that pops into my head is I do!
Saige thinks for a moment.
Saige:
Go kick ceiling guy in the nuts for me, please.
Impulse:
Got it!
Impulse zooms off, a scream can be heard in the distance, and Impulse returns.
Impulse:
Done.
Saige:
Alright, so… let’s get to the nitty-gritty. What’s your gain? The last time I encountered one of you, I had to put him in his place.
Impulse hugs Saige.
Impulse:
Thank you so much for that! Wrath is a jerk! I loved watching that! It’s my favorite memory to replay, right after the memory of you showing up at our house for the first time.
Saige:
Oh… that’s… nice.
Saige pushes Impulse off of herself.
Saige:
Please answer my question, or I’ll have to give Hayze back control.
Impulse backs up a few steps.
Impulse:
I’m not like Wrath or Khaos. I don’t want to be in control to kill people or take over the world or whatever those guys want! I just want to have fun, and Hayze doesn’t do that a lot on his own, so a guy like me needs to take control every once and a while and let loose!
Impulse grabs Saige and dip poses with her.
Impulse:
Like telling the most beautiful girl around how beautiful she is.
Saige pushes Impulse off of her again.
Saige:
Again, Impulse, I appreciate it, but you’re not my type.
Impulse:
Although I’m a splintered personality of Hayze’s, I still have his fiery passion for never giving up!
Saige:
Well, that I do like. Also, if that’s all you’re after, I guess it’s alright for you to stay in control for a little. It is kind of funny seeing Hayze all energetic and tenacious.
Impulse:
Sweet!
Saige:
Anyway, I have to be going. Enjoy your control while it lasts.
Saige starts to leave, but Impulse cuts her off.
Impulse:
Wait, where are you going?
Saige:
The beauty pageant, I have to be there soon before it starts-
Impulse picks up Saige princess style.
Impulse:
Soon, you say?
Impulse speeds Saige to the pageant.
Impulse:
There you go.
Saige:
Wow… that was fast.
Impulse:
That’s not what she said.
Saige:
Shut it, Impulse.
Impulse:
Rude!
Impulse lets Saige down.
Impulse:
Good luck. I’ll be rooting for you!
Impulse zooms away to get a seat.
Saige:
(Looks like Hayze got lucky… at least one of his personalities isn’t an awful person. I wish I had gotten that luxury…)
Saige heads backstage.
Karma:
There she is!
Lilith:
Just in the knick of time!
Blair:
Yay…
Saige:
Awwww, Blair is happy to see me!
Blair:
Shut up, whore!
Saige:
I’d leave that negative energy back here if I were you. The judges don’t want a sourpuss to win.
Karma:
Speaking of which, who are the judges?
Madame Mummy walks on stage.
Madame Mummy:
Welcome to the first annual U.A. beauty pageant…
The crowd of almost entirely men roars.
Madame Mummy:
We had a panel of three unbiased judges with many years of experience judging these types of events scheduled to be here, but they’re still getting through security. So, they’re out.
The crowd looks confused.
Madame Mummy:
To worry, though, we had three students volunteer to judge the competition in their place.
The crowd looks pissed.
U.A. Student 1:
Come on, man, I want that gig!
U.A. Student 2:
Who are the lucky bastards!
Madame Mummy:
They have zero experience judging beauty pageants, and they are definitely biased. Here are your judges.
Isaiah, Demetri, and Alden strut on stage wearing fur coats, fedoras, Rolexes, Gucci sunglasses, and fake mustaches with Gucci canes.
Isaiah:
It’s time!
Demetri:
To judge!
Alden:
Some beauty!
The crowd roars.
Blair:
Are.
Lilith:
You.
Eve:
Fucking.
Karma:
Kidding.
Ash:
Me.
